Lau Da De blog

2010-12-16T10:34:00.000-08:00

Dear blog,

How r u today?? im doing fine thank u... haha... anyhoos... reason y i wrote on u today was to express how i feel today... actually i feel fine right now but today was a little bit disappointing... and a abit happy a few minutes ago...

Now, y do i feel disappointed today was that i had a dream and my dream was... well... postponed... but still it is a dream... my dream was to be on stage!!! singing to my hearts disire and i had that oppurtunity to live my dreams!!! but, alas!! my dream was crushed by me mother... well.. not exactly crushed tho... i don't feel that bad... just abit disappointed that she wouldn't let me go... thats all.. but still... i will have my chance... my reall dream is to end up singing for the American Idol!!! ^^... Hey... a person has to dream big right??? haha

Now, y was i happy a few minutes ago... a frend called and he was a little bit upset... so we talked abit on the phone... and i tried cheering him up... but that wasn't reason y i was happy... i was happy coz bigfoot came down and played checkers with me... haha... ok ok... the truth is... im happy coz he choose me instead of any1 else... wat i mean is that there is so many people in the world to choose from... and i can say i proud that he choose me to talk to... im really touched u know... either way... his the person i'd 1st turn to if i have any problems to... so.. i just wanna say that im happy to realise that i have a fren like him... tho i know this sounds abit unappropriated but i wanna show him how i appreciate a good frend he is.. but sometimes i don't really know how... hmm... o well... i firgure something out...

well... thats all for to day blog.. nothing much really.. nothing exciting is happening now adays... but still... better then all those emo times i have... haha... well.. thats all from me... CHEERS BLOG!!!

FROM, Sean.

I AM WORRIED!!!

2010-12-15T05:20:00.000-08:00

i worry sometimes... about wat u ask?? about santa and his red nose raindear... haha... but seriously... for everytime i say im proud.. im actually worried.. worried that i would lose my best fren... and i know i should be proud... and i am.. at the same time worried...

when i was in high school... i had 5 best frenz... we do all sorts of silly stuff together.. but then 1 found a girlfren.. and he spend more time with her then us... but of course... we were happy for him that he found love... but at the same time we were worried that all he c was love!! eventually... he came back coz he got dumped and of course we were there to cheer him up... after all... we r still best of frenz..

And now its happenning all over again... but this time... its just the 2 of us... i mean... the 5 of us r still best of frenz but each went on our saperate ways... so yeah.. hmmm...

wat to do wat to do...

Some more extra info...

2010-12-04T06:54:00.000-08:00

u know wat i come across today??? BIG FOOT.... AND E... FUCKIN... T.... (ET)... u know... the Extra Terrestrial... the alien with wrinkle on his body and... and places u really don't wanna find wrinkles at??!!... u still don know??? how about the alien who uses his magic finger to fix things??? (i wonder how he digs his nose... he would be like "ow damn... there's a big 1 in my nose"... BING!!! it become a basket)... haha... u still don't know??? hmm.. here... maybe this would refresh your memory!!!

okay... here it is... u remember him now??? if u don't... then BURN IN HELL!!! wait... that came out wrong... i mean... burn and... umm... ermm... er.... tell!!! yeah!!! burn and tell... thats it... okay.. now... moving on...

i saw him last week.... ET of course... with my bike!!! he stole my bike!!!! if u seen my bike flying across the moon in the sky... like this...

plz report to me!!! theres even a kid with... erm... it.... so plz!!! tell me if u c this in the sky!!! or anywhere else...

2010-11-27T08:05:00.000-08:00

dear blog,

u know how everyday i get bored... well... i still do... the thing is... i always thought doing something... like for example... go to the gym, play some basketball, hang out and couple of more things... but whenever i thought of something to do... im always alone... nobody's there to accompany me... i mean.... u can do studd with any1 u know right?? but i mean... i wan go there to enjoy each others company... and maybe enjoy the sports a little... thats not the point... i mean... come on... wat kind of sports is enjoyed doing alone??? though i know we as humans need some alone time.. but come on... i need frenz to u know... well... i do have frenz... i guess the term was... A BROTHER.... u know... whenever im hungry... i can always rely on some 1 to accompany me... when im bored... i know where to go to kill some time... when i do something... there is always some 1 there doing something with me... u know... like a brother!!! hmmm...

i guess that losing a best frend to the opposite gender is something i just got to get use to... i mean... i should be proud of my frend getting a girl fren... and where am i these days??? alone... at home... doing nothing... if i wanna something... i'll have to do it alone... coz... i gues his just accupied with his bz life...

few years back... i've prayed... on my knees... yea... i do pray... continuing... on my knees... that i wish to make every1 around me to be as happy as they can be... even if it means that i have to suffer... as long as there happy... im still ok with it... i'll go to the end of the world to c them happy... and i guess my wish is coming true...

so to all of u out there whos reading this post... don't worry about me... as long as your happy... im happy for u...

from Sean.

My epic story!!!

2010-11-15T06:31:00.000-08:00

yo ho ho me hartys!!! have at thee!!! sorry... i just trying to entertain myself... u know... speaking like a pirate... acting like 1 when nobody's around... -.-.... yeah... i know... im a sad boy lonely boy with no options... wat ever.... haih... but that doesn't matter... i just wanna share some of my story with u.... and this 1 is great.... (everything said here is true... nothing is fake... if u think its fake... i will kill u in your dream ^^)

its was 1956... when i was the captain of the submarine call "St' Balls"... i was the best workin submarine ever made!!! steamed driven actually... well... if u don;t believe me then take a look for yourself!!!

u see... i would never lie to u readers!!! i such a good person.... ooo... and down there.. the guy with the cool looking jacket... is my dad... he wanted to steal the submarine but i cought him red handed.... try and steal that!!!!

wat u c there r the toughest and meanest things in the world... u touch it and it goes wild on u... i meant the torpedoes... and those r my parents... they r the creators...

this here is the name of my crew... it was a long battle that day!!! these are the name of the people... who couragously.... came to my BIRTHDAY PARTY!!! wooh... that was 1 heck of a party... and it was in the sub... then we got attacked coz the driver got drunk and ram into a japanese battleship.... alooooooot of people died back then... but i survived by trading my life with this peice of candy!!!

see... see... its licurish (i think thats how its spelled)... the long... erm.. rubbery??? er... sweet??? oowww u get the point!!! haha... so there.... thats how i survived and made it till now... hope u enjoyed it!!! haha

weird...

2010-09-26T10:04:00.000-07:00

u know wat... i come a cross alot of things lately... aliens... ghost... and even justin bieber hitting his head on a glass door... yes... as stupid as it may sound... he did hit his head on the door... evidently he needs to do something with them eyes...

now most of the things that i saw... the all from YOUTUBE... yea yea... i know... ugh... (everyones a critic)... but i say all of them r FAKE AND GAY!!!! put the is 1 thing tht i can't put my head on.... take a look at this vid....

now to me.... that thing looks like a star-fish... maybe it is... maybe it ain't... i mean... who knows wat the heck that is... haha... u tell me...

now that thing is not that creepy... i mean... it looks like a star-fish right??!! but wat abut this thing??? they say it looks like a hairless dog with beak and chicken fingers or some sort... check it out... ooo... and they call it the MONTAUK MONSTER coz it was found at the coast of montauk... which is a place...

but i don't know wat this is... y don't u tell me wat this thing is... if your correct... i'll give u a prize!!!!!

Where is the Love y'all??!!

2010-09-22T07:21:00.000-07:00

A really good fren... heck... best fren told me a story this afternoon... i don't know whether this is confidential or anything but i promise i won't say his name out... he told me about wat happened last night... he said he went to visit a fren... and that fren is a girl... which i don't know who... anyhoo... he told me that they were outside of the girls house.... by her invatation of course... he told me that he refused her invite to many times... so y not just pay her a visit for the last time.... like i was saying... they were outside of the girls house.... talking, chatting, and wat not... and he told me that before he leaves... the girl request for a last good bye hug... and of course... as a gentleman... he kindly grants her request... after the hug... thing went abit wild... he told me that the girl started to lean forward and tried to make out with him... but as we all know... he was already taken... and he is still now... but of course... he knows that too... before the girl was able to land the kiss... he told her that they shouldn't be doing this... that it was bad for the both of them... and the girl stoped and retreated home by saying a quick good bye and a sad face...
he told me that he feels bad by not kissing her... i mean not granting wat she wants... but as a man... he kept his loyalty to his lover...

i realise something right after he told me that... i realise that the girl who he loves now... don't know how lucky she was.. no... IS... to have a boyfren like him... for the 1st time in my life... i've never seen such compation, honesty, loyalty to the one person that he loves... i realise that he was greatful to wat he has and wat he haves now... butin the other hand... i realised something else... wat about me??? y couldn't i feel wat he feels now??? y couldn't i feel inpoetant to somebody's life... someones waiting for him somewhere else... y can't someone be waiting for me???

For 19 years... i feel empty, though sometimes my frenz cheer me up... and when we share secrets like brothers do... i found out that i can never relate... my fren ask me a question right after he told me that story... he asked "how do u know when your really in love???"... i sat there... thinking... and i asked myself the same question... how do i know when i'm in love???... nothing... i felt empty... useless... like i couldn't contribute anything.... i realise that... i am just a pupet of man... and objected being used... and when their done with me... they'll just put me a side... hopeless...

But for 1 thing... i do a appreciate wat my frenz done for me... but in a point... i realise that i'm just like a tin man... i have no heart and i can never feel love.... to be honest... im just jealous... i've been saying this for more then 15 years... jealous... of all my frenz... and it maybe me realise that i can nver find love... even if i try....

DEAR BLOG,

2010-08-16T06:36:00.000-07:00

i once heard that honesty is the best policy somewhere... i think i was in a place where everybody was forced to go and they stuffed us in a room around 50 people and we all couldn't leave and there was a person in front the room talking to himself which i... no... we didn't care... yea... i think it was him who said the honesty policy thing... haha...

well... i never really realize how that made me feel... untill today... to be honest... i wasn't being honest at all these couple of weeks... i wasn't honest to myself... i wasn't honest to my friends... i wasn't honest to the person i loved/like... either way... i just wasn't honest... i write here today... to brake all the lies that told... to me... to my frenz.. to every1... so hear me out...

in the past few weeks... i was sad, angry and confused... i hide all my feelings away in my heart untill i couldn't take it any more... i feel sad evey night before i sleep... kept telling myself y i couldn't do the things that every 1 could... and the answer i always tell myself is becoz i'm just not born with it... kept telling myself that i can do... i can do it this time... and in the end... i failed... always wondering y a i such a loser... and so on and so forth...

but this is where dishonesty come in handy... i hid my bad feeling from my family so they wouldn't worry about me... i hid them from my frenz so i wouldn't c them from becoz of me... well... also not to worry them too... and this is where a fool myself... giving myself hope for the impossible... truth is... all of this was a lie... every single 1 of it....

love sean.

Today...

2010-08-09T23:15:00.000-07:00

Today is a sad day... i don't know y but it is... this morning i went for class... i was alone... i don't blame any1 for that... i intended it... but after class... i went to to cafeteria for some food... i saw no 1 that i knew... it was like i'm there for the very 1st time.... like i knew no 1... it was weird and sad... to know that there is so many people in that university... and your still lost within it... in addition... my depression haven't quite run off me yet... and to top it all of... i was at home till i heard my dad shouting... i thought it was becoz of the dogs and all that... till i open my room door... my dad and my mom was fighting... my dad shouted at her saying " i hated when your like that... GET AWAY FROM ME" and my mom shouted back " u SHIT U.. I TOLD U SO MANY TIMES..." then my dad slamed the door as he walk out....

i always hated when they fight... i can always imagine how my mom feels when she faught with my dad... pain and sorrow... anger and agression... but something in her kept her those feelings locked up... for so many years... i never knew i have to face this kind of day.... and let me tell u... its no fun going through wat i'm going through...

i know some people have worst days then this... but for a some1 like my age to suffer from this pain and sorrow... y let it happen???

2010-08-09T07:59:00.001-07:00

Dear Blog,

Something happened that day... i confessed and i proposed... and some how i should be feeling quite happy and all that... but no... im not.... for some reason... every time i think of it... it makes me sad... am i not trying hard enuff??? no... i'm just not good enuff??? no... i don't know anymore... maybe i should give up doing wat i should do... maybe nobody wants me... u know.. i told myself that falling in love with a self centred girl would be impossible... but i found a girl who saw me from who i am inside... and still... i can't... uuuhhhh,,, nvm... maybe im just unwanted by the world... even when people see me for who i am in the inside... maybe im just not meant to have any1... to die alone in this stupid world...

u know... i always thought that 1 day... my faith will lead me to the girl who will see me for who i am inside and not for how i look outside... and i finally found her... she was really the piece to my heart... that final piece... that fits just right in my heart... but some how... i.... i don't know... maybe i wasn't good enuff for her... maybe i don't fit into her heart... maybe im just not her missing piece... maybe it was just not meant to be... i don;t know... i guess i'll never find out...

love Sean.

What happened...

2010-08-08T11:52:00.000-07:00

Dear Blog,
I did wat needs to be done today... about the string thing... yeah... i pulled it all the way... and i found out that at the other end of it was... well... nothing... it breaks me to find nothing in the end... i fell into the darkness of my heart... feeling sorrow and pain... all together cramping my heart... i was depressed deeply... but i wasn't showing it... not to her of course... but i never blame her for that... i guess its just a stage in life... its like my dad use to say... " in life... sometimes we fail... its is the way of life... but as faiure proceeds... we gain knowledge" or in other words... by failing we learn... not failing... well... not so much...

When i fell into the dark... i stayed in the dark the whole time... till i found light that carried me up again... and that light was my frenz... they saved me from being a broken man... as i got rejected... i didn't feel that bad... so i have to say... thx man... for being there...

Dear God,
I guess u heard my prayer in the last post... u did break my heart but it wasn't that broken... i guess believing in u was just wrong... i always thought that u will always set my path in love.... i guess i way way wrong...

I don't get it... y do u still curse me... i believe in u... i had hope that she'd be the 1... but i was wrong to trust u... do u wish for me to live alone??? now i'm starting to doubt that your helping me or not... thought my heart be broken... so is my trust in u....

Love Sean.

love struck.

2010-08-07T10:37:00.001-07:00

for some reason.... love got me hanging on by a thread... i don't know whether to keep pulling on it or cut it off or just keep hanging on it... sometimes i said to myself... maybe u keep pulling on it and 1 day u might get to the end... but the string isn't letting me get wat i 1... for a moment i pull on the string... it starts to break but its not breaking... sometimes the string pulls me up abit... encouraging me to find out wats on the end of the string...

my heart and my head is confused now... each saying a different thing.. my brain is saying that the string is not letting me have wat i 1... so i might as well just cut the string and forget everything... but my heart says otherwise... my hearts been telling me that i should find wats on the end of it... either way u may find nothing or something... at least u tried your best doing so... i don't know which to listen to.... my brain is telling me facts... but my heart is giving me hopes.... i'm confused...

Dear god,
Why do u curse me with this life... i have nothing on me that atracts women... i have no love life... i only have money but i don't 1 people loving me becoz of my money... i 1 2 experiences true love... but i have this feeling that i never will...

God, i only wish for 1 thing... even though it may not work out tomoro... plz have mercy on my heart... though it may be broken... but plz break it with ease....
love Sean.

2010-07-06T09:58:00.000-07:00

u know wat... i never thought i'd say this but i think i'm in love.... for some weird reason... yes... me... i do fall in love... i am human to u know!!! haha... u know... i always told myself that love can never be rushed... when it come... it comes...

i seen alot of people rushing into relatioships... i don't know whether thats good or bad but i never bother about relationship at that time... huh... go figure... but i always told myself that in the future... time will set me up with some who is right for me... the ONE!!! well... i guess its my 1 and only huh??!! ^^... and i guess that time has come.... and now i don't even know i'm in love or not.... haha... funny isn't it... ^^... i had dreams about her... i sometimes day dream about her... and i even get distracted by her... so does that count as love??? haha

Now i know that u people might ask " who is she??!!" or "wats her name Sean???!!!" and "can u give me her facebook profile??!!!"... and my answers to those question r...... no telling u... not telling u... and NO.... all i can ask u is that i need your help... so help me put plz??!!! wat to do??!!! i have no clue... plz... tell me wat to do!!!!

Aliens...

2010-05-02T06:39:00.000-07:00

let me ask u a question... wat comes to mind when i say aliens??? yes... aliens... no i'm not crazy... no i don't believe in it... and no.. I'm not a potato... haha... right... Aliens... do u really think they exist??? well... i for 1 will not believe that Aliens DO live among us in space... but some people do... and surprisingly... some of them actually think that its a creation of God himself... some even thinks that Aliens r actually havouring in space keeping an eye on us... or something like that... but since u don't believe it... neither do i... maybe this video might change the way we look at it....

a bit strange is it??? i don;t know whether there r such things out there or not.. i'll believe it when i c it... wat about u??? tell me wat u think??!!!

random...

2010-04-30T10:31:00.000-07:00

ok.... wat do u get... when u have 2 man... sitting in the sidewalk... near a bench... drinking alcohol... all night???

well...

this....

haha...

the fact that people r more creative when their drunk leave me to no other perspective that... well.. their smarter when there drunk... i mean... who needs a bed??? right??? and who needs a house??? they can find shelter for themselves... i think when they wake up... they'll take a bottle of beer... and go hunting for nerds... i don;t know y nerds... so don't ask... anyhoos...they like there pretty comfortable sleeping under a bench and on 1... hahaha...

so... Bennet pui... Elisha lee... Jack... and all the people whole likes to party... espeacially these 3... i wont be suprise if i saw u people sleeping in the park bench... i might call the cops on u.. ^^... thk u....

so yeah.... remember... DRINK MORE ALCOHOL.... it WILL make u smart... hahah...

Loneliness...

2010-04-07T07:25:00.000-07:00

wat do u c in this picture??

a person sitting alone???

a shadow of some1???

or for u creative people... just a picture...

but if u ask me... i c myself there.... its like i said before... surrounded with some many frenz... but u still feel lonely in the end... everytime i c this picture... i think of wat i've done in the past that made me this way... i feel so useless and so meaningless... from wat i c... i'm nothing....

i kept on thinking that i was created into this world to feel lonely... evey1 just leaving me behind... in school... in class... at home... nobody is always there when i needed them... and thats when i thought about a girlfren...

i thought it through and WAT THE HELL WAS I THINKING... i mean... i will never have a chance with women... becoz... well... my looks aren't as good as u think... to me... i admit it.... i'm ugly... i;m hedieos... there is nothing to look at... and to c that people... no... guys... with looks...they always have a better chance... without even doing anything... they just be themselves and boom... a girl starts drueling over them... to me... this is a kind of a sensitive issue... i always thought... "wat do they have that i don't???!!! OOoo... good looks..."

all of this is just unfair to me... i feel as if i am created to be alone in the world... to live my life alone... and to end it alone... i can imagine already that my funeral will be empty... huh...

u know... every night before i go to sleep... i think back on wat have i done in the past... find my 1st love=no.... get good grades=no... achieve my goals=no... then i thought back again... acting all tough and strong just to think that i actually did something useful in my life... but actually... i'm just a coward... who does nothing but act... a useless, lonely, coward...

so right now... i feel as if i found nothing in my life but me and my shodow... thats how i feel tonight...

2010-03-30T07:22:00.000-07:00

how does it feel to be surrounded by frenz but u don't even know 1 of them??? how does it feel to have all the knowledge in the world but u can't use any of it??? how does it feel when u have all the money in the world but its worthless??? i'll tell u how it feels... u feel cooled and unwanted... u feel useless and meaningless... u feel like all your hardwork put up for nothing... I... for 1... FEEL's LOST...

there r many things that we do that never consider into the world... and most people would tell me to wake up from wat i'm in... to me... i'm already awake... to c that this is reality... i don't know wat to do... sometimes i feel that me existing in this life is a wrong thing for the God's to do... i'm not exactly a bad person... i don't steal.. i don't vandalise... i don't take drugs... i simply enjoy wat life has to offer... but neither am i a good person... i don't help the needy... i don't help the old... i simply live my own life where i can live in peace...

for 1 thing that i know... to be myslef is just not enuff... it seems that being myself surrounds me with frenz... but being myself or some 1 else can never get me a true frend who helps me when i need help... some1 to get me back up my feet when i fall... some1 who truly understands me... but i c now that all i have r just frenz... though i appreciate wat i have... but to c that myself alone with nothing... nothing but me and my shadow sitting together... is just... pethatic... i feel lost... i feel... ALONE...

DREAM!!!

2010-03-28T07:21:00.000-07:00

Dreams... wat r they??? to me... there illusions of wat the heart desires... have u ever dream before??? huh... wat a i saying... of course u have... everybody is an equal right??? even the brainless can dream... no doubt about it... but have u ever wondered that maybe u can make your dream a reality??? well.. i have... in fact... i tried several times but my dreams where often ended up dead... every time my dreams dies... i change a new 1...

wat r my dreams really... at 1st wanted to be a celebrity chef... cooking all the food that i like and serving them to the people with a smile... to be on tv where some kid would watch me do a cooking show and follow my recepies...

i wanna be like these people... working hard in the kitchen ... make the food taste the best... wear 1 of those hat all them fancy chefs are wearin and make the world know who made these delicious foods... but... alas, this can only remain as a dream...

i knew that being a chef is impossible in my reality where my mom and dad would say (more to me mom), "there is no future for u in a chef... its so hard to be 1... u have to stand in frint of a hot stove everyday and stand the whole day and bla bla bla...." i didn;t catch the last part but the main thing is that my mom wouldn't let me be a chef... its not that i can't cook... i can cook... i cooked up some amzing stuff, ican tell u that... hahaha but my parents just wouldn't let this dream come true...

anyhoos... since my dream of being a well known chef could never happened... i took on another dream... to c the stars at a distent place... like space... to actually be in space where i can c the how the sun actually look like wiht my own to eyes... to c how the moon looks like... to c how the earth looks like... no more videos... no more pictures from the internet... i wanna c it with my own to eyes...

look at this photo... just look at it... though it is abit blur but look beyond the blur-ness... look at how vast the sky is... its limitless... don't u ever wonder wat its like to look on the mountain on the other side of this picture??? to c how beautiful the earth looks...

i've decide to change my dream to a reality... where i can c the world using my own to eyes... i promise myself that i will do that before i die... so thats y i've chosen to study astronomy... wat do think i should do to fufill my dreams???!!

betrayal

2010-02-12T10:13:00.000-08:00

have u ever feel cold steel run through your body before??? a bullet? a steel pipe??? or maybe a KNIFE???!!! well... i have... and i guess that having that in me isn't as fun as it sounds or looks... but i don't mean it literally of course... i mean getting stab at the back... to ever call them brothers and they do nothing to appreciate the things u do... to call them best frenz when toy with u like your some kind of machine... to call them frenz when they do nothing to help u out...

for some reason... i keep on telling myself that being kind to other or at least be generous to them would be the right thing to do... and it is... its not about the thing u get in return... its just becoz its right... but... for all these years... i've done my part for my frenz and they did nothing for me... sure they treat me to a meal or 2... but still... they stab me in the back by doing nothing... i needed their to solve my problems... wat do they do?? nothing...

i'm sick of it... i'm sick of my life... i'm sick of having to call these people my frenz who stabs me in the back... and i'm sick of getting scolded for the things i didn't do... wat does the world has against me... living in a rich family when i can't share anything with the people i care most... maybe i'm just not meant to have frenz...

u know... i don't get it... if they were really my frenz... they would do wat they can to help me solve this problem... huh... but who was i kidding... i don't have frenz... i'm always alone in this world... i guess that god doesn't 1 me to have frenz... to live in the shadows forever... -.-...

romance in a dream

2010-02-06T10:34:00.000-08:00

u know... i've been telling myself... will i ever find a girl??? and sometime.. i just let myself down and say "with how i look now, there's just no way your gonna find a girl!!!" but wat are the odds of that... a million to 1??? haha... but but that wat i'm about to tell u...

dear fellow readers,
as strange as this may be... i'm about to lead u to a world which u never seen before... a world where great things happen... a world where a the greatest unfold its beauty upon us... a world which i like to call it my mind... haha... just gonna tell u a dream i had i few days ago... ^^

well... this is how it started... i was at home doing nothing... then sudden;y i poped in a restaurant with the girls of my dreams... we were havin a candle light dinner and there was a guy playing a violin just for us... he played the night away as i bask at her beauty and how she looked that night... she was wearin a very very nice dress... white in color... and i wasn't sure about me... i guess i was to distracted by how she looked... after dinner... we went for a walk at the beach at night... the moon a round and bright and the starts was shining bright... it was as if we were suppose to be together that night...

so as we walk... our feet got tired... well... her feet got tired... so we sat at a bench that was facing the ocean... and as we sat down... i felt awkward becoz me and her weren't talking... its was strange... then out of no where... she touched my hand and leaned on my shoulder... she pulled my hand over her and put my hand around her shoulder... and of course... i felt more then awkward... i felt happy... never in my life i felt this happy...

as we sat there watching the moon shine upon us... she said to me in her sweet sweet voice " i had a wonderful night and i can believe i can spend this night with u"... i smiled and laughed a little... i told her something to... "u know wat?? this is my first time falling in love... and i can't believe that i can fall in love with u!!!" at that moment... i woke up... and straight away... i EMO!!!! -.-

Sick of it!!!

2010-01-24T06:52:00.000-08:00

do u know wat i'm sick of??? i'm really sick of it... to think that i have tons of frenz and i did nothing to appreciate the thing they do... to say "live my life to the fullest" where i'm just fooling myself... to be a piece of nothing, a piece of dead weight to the world where nobody thinks i even exist... i sick of my life... sometimes i dream... yeah... even people like me dream... worthless piece of nothing dreams too... its just wonderful to dream... so wish that i can live in a dream and never wake up... but thats just a fantasy we all wish for... and we all know that wishes never come true becoz it doesn't even exist to begin with... its just a word that manipulates our minds believe that some would come true in a maricle... to fill nonsense in our mind... like hope and love and all these other bullshits.. but wat ever these things r... they seem to work work with our minds... even though we know that these r just words that means nothing... it still brings hope to our heads... well... most people... i for 1 never believe that wishes r true... everything we do in this world lies in the faith of our hands... but to know that u can never accomplish the things that u wish for... hurts deep within me... there r some moment that i just really 1 2 kill myself and start over... but wat good will that do... u tell me??!!

fear...

2010-01-13T23:35:00.000-08:00

have u ever fear about something... well... everybody is affraid of something right???... even the toughest people in the world is affraid of something too... and to get rid if this fear, u have to face it... that way your fears would be affraid of u... but have u ever fear about something that u can't face... that's inevitable... somethng that going to happen... even if u try to stop it... it will still happen... have u??? well... i have... in fact... that's my greastest fear... 1 which can never be rid of... and that fear is losing my best fren....

i know that life has to go on and we all move on but to have something that u worked for years... just dissapears like that... the bond we have, the fun we had, laughs we had... all gone... a frend of mine is going off to japan... his a best fren that i had for a long time... longer then anybody i know... we play golf together when we were kids... we give each other company if we needed it... and we help each other when either one of us fall from walking on the path of life... but to know that your going to lose a fren which is that precious to u... it burns inside... sometimes i wish we shouldn't grow up... as days pass... new things seems to happen... and sometimes those things r hard to bare...

i'm guessing thats life... u lose 1 and gain another... but wat if i don't 1 2 lose 1... i want it there... i 1 2 have my best fren to come to birthday every year... i 1 my best fren to come to my wedding and be the best man... 1 want my best fren there so i can enjoy it with him and still have the laughs we use to have... but as we know... life is never fair... and we all have to face it....

i know this may sound abit weird but i consider my frenz more important then my wife in the future... and maybe sometimes more important then my family... without my best frenz... nobody is there to help me... nobody that i can talk to... freely... sometimes i'm affraid of talking to my parents about my problem becoz they can never understand the pain that i have...

i write this post becoz i want people to know that i have a frend who is like a brother to me... and losing him is like losing a limb... so who evers reading this post... keep your best fren as close as u can... cheerish it... becoz in the future... u never wat life will do to saperate u away from him or her...

kuala lumpur.... DAMIT...

2010-01-02T17:49:00.000-08:00

well... welcome to kuala lumpur i'd say... u know y i say so???... coz i'm in kuala lumpur... and u know wat... i think i have this grude with kl... the 1st time i was here... it was like 2 years ago... i came here for vacation and i got food poisoning!!!! god damit.... and let me tell u... getting food poisoning ain't fun... u get headache 24/7... if u eat wrong u get stomachache... then u feel dizzy and vomit alot....

The 2nd time was last year... i went to kuala lumpur for a shopping celebration with me family... i got sick that time to... well... not exactly sick though... i went out for dinner with me dad and let me tell u... that dinner... it came in then came out the same way!!! geez... i mean... have u ever felt the food come back right out just after u finish??? DAMN... it ain't a pretty sight either... haha...

the 3rd time is today... actually it was yesterday... i was in the car playing with me teeth... like chomping on me awn teeth and all that... but all of a sudden i felt this sharp pain and i heard a crack sound in me teeth... i was like "waaatt the??"... a little push here and there... a tooth felt out... but not the whole thing... like a part of it... now i got like half of a tooth... well... not actually half... a quater of the tooth broke... so yea... KUALA LUMPUR... don't be suprise if u get nuked in the future!!!! ^^

how???

2009-12-22T22:52:00.000-08:00

These few days have been... well... boring but... thats the best time for u to think about stuff that u never thought of.... take me for example.... yesterday was a boring day... couldn't do anything... so i was just downstairs sittin there and thinking about some thing which i never thought of.... just starin into space... just like that... lol... which brings me to my topic... "how???"... wow... i'm like promoting a book or something.... haha... anyhoos... i thought of a lot of stuff before and yesterday i thought about something that actually hit me on the head... u know wat i mean... i thought how... how do i win a girls heart... when i was in form 4... i had this crush on this girl... i didn't know who she was untill we had tuition together at the same place... from then on... she starts to know i exists in this world... abit later... i get abit closer to her... i mean as frenz... nothing else... not best frez... just frenz.... got it...

A year past and we were still in the same tuition... slowly i had this weird feeling about her... the way she laugh is always in my head... her kindness towards people touches my heart... and to boot, she has some sarcasm too... lol... the thing is... i couldn't get her out of my head... the creepy part is sometimes i dream about her.... wooow... so... u know... i tried being me... maybe its just a feeling... nothing else... i kept telling myself its just a feeling, i don't love her... but everytime she passes through the hall way and walked through my class... she would wave to me and put on the sweetest smile ever!!! everytime she passes by me or my class... she would wave her hand and smiled like an angel.... i couldn't believe wat i was tellin myself... but in the end... i admit that i had a little crush on her... the moment that i admit to myself was near to her birthday... so i asked her wat will she do on her birthday??? and she said nothing... i was shocked to c that a girl like her would do nothing on her birthday... so... why not i do something for her.... me and my tuition teacher talked it out and some of my frenz too... i baught a cake and threw a small celebration for her... consider it my present for her... i was so embarressed that time... i was blushing all over my face and i tried to keep it cool... acting all polite and all that... helping her do everything... help her cut the cake... give out the cake and all that... inthe end she said that it was her very 1st cake in her birthday... so i don't know whether thats a good thing or not but that not the point... after that i sent some flower and a box of chocolate for her on valentimes... and i visited her shop just so i can talk to her... but no matter wat i just couldn't win her heart... i just don't know y!!!! maybe i did something wrong... maybe i don look good... i don't know... i need your help... i really do... some one please????

ooo... and the info on facebook saying that i was in a realationship was fake... just wanted to c how u would react if i posted that out!!!! ^^ cheers!!

wow... lonely experience...

2009-12-13T01:05:00.001-08:00

u know wat i've done today??? nothing bad i can assure u!!! lol..... anyhoos... i woke up in the morning doing nothing... my parents went out for golf and i was alone at home... don't worry... i'm always alone at home... but thats not the point... they went off and i haven't had my breakfast yet and it was already 11 a.m... so... i cooked up a packet of megi mee and ate it myself... after that i went upstairs and took a shower!!! went i walked out of bathroom... i thought to myself... "wat the heck should i do today???"... i cant do any sports today becoz the only car left was the mercedez and NO... i'm not a allowed to use the merc for any sports transportation coz i'll get all sweaty and stink up the car!!! so the only thing to do is to take the merc for a spin in the town and no... not spin as in 1 spot!!! lol... SO... as i get ready to go out... i called up some frenz... u know wat happened... i got shunt... well not exactly shunt per say... they were all bz and as i thought longer... some of them ain't in miri... haih... soooo... i went out to boulevard alone... with nobody else... only mua... lol... then i went to parkson ALONE... but i didn't went in coz it was crowded with cars... but when i was in boulevard... ALONE!!!!... haha... i thought to MYSELF... "this is the perfect time to have a girlfren"... but wat was i thinking right??? a person like me get a girlfren??? haaaaaah!!!! i need like a hundred years to get a girl to notice me... well.. maybe i'm abit exaggerating but u get the point right??!! well... just wanna say that today was the loneliest day i ever experience... haha...

yummm... thinking of it make me drool!!!

2009-12-10T09:05:00.000-08:00

u know wat... people do stuff in there free time.. like ride bicycles in the park... gardening... maybe even do some flirting for i know... but for me... i like cook... yea yea... i know its sisi stuff... but who cares!!!! wat matters is that i like doing it.. ^^... and yea... this explains my size... haha... but... i don't always have free time and ingredients requiere money and thats wat i don't have recently... but i like today dream alot... no... not about girls... about food... haha

it may work u know... just think about it...

deep fried mash patatoes with spicy deep...

raosted ham with red wine sauce....

and for dessert... up-side-down appricot caramel pie!!!!

or...

ice-cream merrang kek...

or...

chocolate chip tart!!!!

damn... just thinking about all this is making drool.... but of course... this won't be cheap... i mean... i made a dinner once... for 6... and it cost me rm150 for the things i don't have...

i did me moms special... patatoes and anchovies...

slow roast chicken wrapped in bacon...

and chocolate covered ice-cream...

that cost me 150 man!!! woooh... and now i'm broke... haha... well... hope i can afford the next meal!!! lol

lonely... i am so lonely...

2009-12-10T08:26:00.000-08:00

well... wat can i say... nothing to do but to just stair at the screen of my lap top and the screen of me tv... i can't find any1 to talk to or to play with or to just have a tea break with... since my brother left to perth... its been abit quiet in the house... only me, me mom and me dad... thats all... ooo and me maid... bt u know how it is... being alone at home... wat about my parents u ask me??? well... they don't exactly know wat i 1 and want i enjoy... i wanna have back that feeling that i can talk freely with my brother about any topic i choose... he would help me and i would help him... although we help each other by talking crap all the time but u get wat i mean right???... now around my parents... they have rules that need to be followed when talking to them... i can say wat i want in front of them... i can argue freely with them.. i have to respect in wat the say and all that... its not that i don't want that... its just that i feel so isolated talking to them... o well... wat to do... nothing but to sit at home and grow mushrooms for this coming holidays!!! lol

Feeling Better

2009-12-09T01:45:00.000-08:00

i had this emotional thing happened to me lately... for some reason... i felt so left out in this world... its like i'm the only 1 living it... no... let me rephrase... it like i don't even exist... surrounded by frenz... but i still feel so lonely... just the other day.... i put out a post saying that i was jealous and all that... asking for help from the good people i know... and it came through... a fren told me that wat i'm jealous about it pretty common... jealous about y people are born a hell lot better then me... she said that everybody feels jealous sometime too... she also said that theres nothing for me to get upset about... as i stood there reading was she said... it came to my mind... "she right... life isn't fair..." i've been telling my whole life this the life just ain't fair... for a moment there... i forgetten all about it... she made me realise that there is really nothing for me to get upset about... that jealousy of the well being is just part of life... not only that but she made me realise that i could change the world if i wanted to... it all depends on wat i do... i realise that now... how can i not realise that sooner... how naive of me!!!... but so far... not matter how many times i say that... "life ain't fair!!" in my heart andin my thoughts... i still have that feeling... maybe it becoz im just lonely... maybe its becoz i got nothing to do all this while... i've been shunt away by fren several time now... asking them out but they have plans... nobody ever looks for me... i'm no 1... i'm just a fren of a fren... well... wat can i say... life just ain't fair...

Why I'm jealous!!!

2009-12-02T00:52:00.000-08:00

i put out a post before saying that i wouldn't say anything emotional and all that but i guess i just have to type this out... i'm in need of desperate help... frenz, family, and even my best frenz!!! this post is mainly about wat i'm jealous about...

have u ever heard of the saying "some people are born with talent, but everybody has talents that needs to be found..." well i'll say, that saying can be applied it wat i'm about to say... like the phrase "some people are born wtih talent..." i'm referring to the people who r born attractive... these people r wat i'm jealous of...

in my experience... i've seen my frenz do absolutely nothing and people starts to get close to him... how??? i don't know... today a played around of golf and i c a girls taking his phone number from out of no where... another frenz that has tons of frenz which r girls... its easy for them to make frenz with girls, i think its becoz that girls want to be with him... there's nothing that stand in their way... he has character, personality, and the most important... looks... do u know wat i was abit pissed off about... when we were playing golf... his phone kept on ringing of text msgs... thats not wat pisses me off... wat pissed me off is that all of the msgs are from girls... from that moment... i kept on thinking.... "we can i be born like him!!!" i mean look at me... i'm nothing!!!! i'm fat... unattractive... from far, i look like an old man... HECK a kid even thought that i was an uncle playing golf!!!... i met a fren at the basketball court and he ask me to accompany him to buy some drinks... all of a sudden he asked me "so... u working for which company?" how pethetic is that???!!!... i look old and fat... some people even say i look like a gangster... sign...

i need help... NO, advice from people out there... wat can i do to rid myself off this jealousy... to find that talent thats inside me... wat???!!!!

Dear readers!!!

2009-11-10T09:25:00.000-08:00

For some reason... i write this blog for readers to get a head start on wat my blog would be about... so i prefer that u would read this 1st then read the others... my blog doesn't contain any emo stuffs in it... though it looks black and white which r the common colors of 'emo people', as u people call them now adays, but it doesn't mean that i'm the kinda person that would right emo stuff in this blog...

any-hoos... this post will be outdated with new post coming but i guess u get the point of wat i'm saying... so i said more then there is to be said... so read ON readers... i wish thy good luck!!!

Best Dessert of my life!!!

2009-10-20T00:24:00.001-07:00

Let me ask u.... who big of a dessert have u ever have in your whole entire life???!!! when i was in australia... geez... this dessert was like big man.... look at this picture right here:

look at that man... wooohhh.... i love that dessert... i was like damn big yet damn delicious man... 6 to 7 scoops of ice-cream, few at the bottom of the glass is hot chocolate fudge and mud cakes with a few marshmallows... and to top it all of... the sprinkled crush nuts, chocolate syrup and strawberry syrup at the top... DAMN!!!! if u ever get a bite of that... then the desserts u take her are like "cheh!!"... hahaha.

Another dessert i like to show u... this can consider as my birthday cake... haha... its kinda weird but its really nice i tell u!!!! take a look:

its actually a cake cross combo with a pizza.. so its a cak-zza... a CAKZZA!!!... lol... but anyways... this desserts is actually unique in a way... the use pizza bread to do the base and the filling is mud-cake... wat's mud cake u ask??? y its actually a kinda cake that taste like fudge... and its toped of with choco syrup with white and milk chocolate... wooooohhhh!!! can't wait to go back there and eat it again!!!!! DAMN!!!!

bank roberry in aus

2009-10-20T00:24:00.000-07:00

Let me tell u readers something about Australia.. 1st of all... its a really nice place to go for a walk in winter... 2nd of all... the air there is so fresh and finally, the landscape of the whole place was like WOW!!! but that's all the good stuff and none of the bad stuff... I'll get to the bad stud later, but 1st... take a look a this picture down here:

what do u c in this picture???
1. Big foot and his mom looking for pray?!
2. a gay guy looking for something to do at night and his mother was there???
3. a boy with his mom sitting outside of the campus office waiting for his brother to finish doing his thing???

if u choose the 1st answer... then your blind with a sense of stupidity in your brain

if u choose the 2nd answer... then your gay/lesbian who has nothing to do but something inappropriate

if u choose the 3rd answer... then your a smart ass

but lets change the story line here a bit... just imagine that that's not curtin campus office... think of it as a bank in australia...

back in the 90's... australian stold my money so gues i just pay them back the favour... nothing wrong with that now right???

this 2nd picture was actually caught by an unknown photographer (which is my dad) before the bank was robbed... that there was mua in the really cool looking hat... and beside me was me mom... i told her to get ready outside, once the alarm sound off and me running out... she have to wait in the car and drive till there's no tomoro... but of course u have to wait for me untill i get in the car... geez... wat r yea... stupid??? do i have to be anymore specific????

any-hoos... after we robbed the bank.. i actually talked to the cops... i told them wat i saw... a saw a 2 girls and a guy that robbed a bank... they looked like this:

this picture is was taken inside of the campus office... i mean bank... the guy on the right is my brother (calvin), the girl in the middle is my cousin and the other girl is my cousin's fren... ooo... by the way... don't ask me stupid question like who the girl at the back!!!!

any-hoos... 2 days later... they were held in the prison of australia for 2 years... thats the reason y my brother is not in miri now!!! ^^

Scary dream

2009-08-25T06:05:00.000-07:00

1st of all... i 1 2 say is HUUUUUURRRRAAAYYYY... i got my lap-top back... but... its suck more then ever... its like even solwer then before man.. how wack-out is that... well.. not really wack-out but u get the point.. the thing is i waited for a whole week for this damn computer 2 get re-formated... a whole week... i almost died becoz i had nothing 2 do the whole night.. no tv... and then no computer... well... there is the ps2 but that just ain't enuff... i mean.. playing that u can't conect with your frenz right??? so yea... ooo... about the dream...

one night... actually it was morning... i just couldn't wake up.. well i did wake up but i just went back 2 sleep... in that short period of sleepy time... i had this really strange dream... it was actually about my past... it went like this... i was in school all of a sudden (in my dream)... i was in primary 4 i think... the little details was abit blurry but anyways... i was in class sitting down while the whole class was doing the same... u can imagin how... in that period of time... our exams was over like a week ago... but something strange happened in the class when we were having this exam... while we were having the exam... a student sitting right beside me was taking the exam seriously... i remember seeing his face... so serious... so focused on his paper... then i went back doing my own paper... then suddenly... at the corner of my eyes.... i saw him slowly turning his head 2 the back and straring at something for quite a long time... seconds later i found out he was staring at the white notice board like every class has at the back of the class... the strange thing was that he was like staring at that thing for a long time... so i was like "wat the...." then the teacher came along and send him into the office for suspision of copying other peoples answer... luckly i wasn't caught by looking at him...

after the a week of exhausting exams... we still have class... as usual we attend... before i went back 2 school.. in the car... i was already thinking of that guy slowly turning his head 2 the back and staring at the white notice board for so long... i was weird u know... so then i went 2 class and sit at my usual sit... and again a was sitting beside that weird guy... 10 minutes later the same teacher that caught that boying sitting next 2 me copying came in and stared teaching... at the end of the class... he gave us a lecture saying that copying other people work is bad... but the boy sitting next 2 me started 2 mumble or whispering or something to himself and of course... i heard him doing wat ever he was doing... i could c that the boy was affraid of something by the looks of his face... i don't know wat but at that moment i feel the same way as he does.. a little bit scared...

while i was in that frightul moment... the teacher finished his lecture and then started asking some question 2 the boy sitting next 2 me... at 1st i thought it was kinda stupid for a teacher asking a question like "u say u saw something at the back which is unappropriate?"... the boy said yes and he turned 2 the back where he saw something and showed the whole class where he saw it... moments later he said "there it is again..." the teacher was abit confused because he couldnt c anything but then the boy kept on saying "there it is... there it is..." i ask him wats is there... and he said writtings of blood on the wall... Just right after he said that... the light started 2 flickker and the rooms starts 2 get abit cold... i was so frighten i didn't know wat 2 do.... the boy turned around again towards the chalk board and said 'there it is again... the writting in blood!!!'... the whole class was in fear... screaming and shouting as the day grew darker... of course the teacher was fighten 2 and as for me... i hid under the table and i saw this boy standing still in his place... i watched him being so focused at something while the whole classroom was in a mess... i was actually starring at his face... so focused on the chalk board... and suddenly he turn his attention 2 me and whispered "DIE!!!!"

after that i woke at that moment and i thought.... wat the hell kinda dream was that???!!!... then i went and continue my daily life... it has been awhile since a had this kinda weird paranormal dreams!!! but u have your ups and downs sometimes....right??!!!

just hope u enjoyed reading my dreams!!!! ^^

new experience

2009-08-24T00:53:00.000-07:00

u know wats new 2 me???... updating my blog inside the computer lab and doing it while i'm having my lesson's... though it is a new expereince... i don't feel so bad myself... it like i broke a law or something... i just finish doing my work and waitng for futher orders... thats all... if u think thats a crime then walking is a national offense... everybody's using wheel chairs and suddenly u stand up... 10 seconds later... men in black suits holding alien technology guns come 2 arrest u and brings u 2 questioning in a secret facility where humans and aliens work together.... ok ok... i've done enough...

life back in school... uni actually

2009-08-23T19:20:00.000-07:00

well well well... due 2 the busy-ness of the school times... i can't say that i'm very free to keep updating this freakin blog... u know wat i mean... at night i need 2 study and do my work... in the morning i have 2 keep the sick poor people from being rob and get 2 class in time... and in the afternoon, after class i have 2 fly off and battle evil 2 save the world form utter destruction... so wat can i say... u know i am so bz... i don even have time 2 write this crap in my own computer... i'm actually writting this post with the schools computer... after this i got class at 11 am... then another class at 12... then after that i have 2 fly 2 australia and find bigfoot just to prove that bigfoot is just an over grown man with a lot of hair on his body... luckly the hair grows in places that it shouldn't grow... so yea... my life is pretty much boring... o well... time for class... haizz...

slow update

2009-08-23T19:17:00.000-07:00

Sorry for the really late updates.... never knew wat 2 write in here... haha... thats a 1st to me... well actually... i'm just abit lz 2 type all this crap in here... though my blog doesn't have that much picture... hope u ain't tired of reading...

Happy Birthday 2 me!!!!

2009-07-10T02:06:00.000-07:00

well now... HAPPY BIRTHDAY 2 me yea!!!... 2day is the 10th of July which is my birthday... hurray!!! but 2 be honest... i haven't touch my blog in ages... actually its just a month but hows counting huh??... now... let me tell u an interesting story about my birthday...

Once upon a time... there live a handsome young boy who has unimaginable power... he could rule the world if he wanted 2... but... i know wat your thinking... his a bad mad using his awesome power 2 rule the world with fear... but let me finish... this handsome, and has awesome power, young boy so kind that his was award with the most kindest person in the world... why, once he even destroy a truck diver and his truck so an old lady could cross the street... another time, his the 1 who caused Global Warming just so he can save the world from ice age once again... u c... he save the world countless of time already... so u can consider him as a kind hearted, super handsome, with awesome powers, kid!!!

OK OK... i know... that story has nothing 2 do with me but on the contrary... it did has something 2 do with me... that kind, super handsome, with awesome powers, young kid is... is... is... my fren.... and he came 2 visit me.... on my birthday!!!! huh ha!!! u thought i was talking about myself now huh??? i'm not that kinda person... how can u think of me that way?!!??!! hmmm???!!?!!?!?!?!? o well... since u put it that way... HAPPY BITHDAY 2 ME!!!! Ooo... 1 more thing... i'm in australia... BUAHAHAHAHAHAHA... idon't know wat so special about that but... BUAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! ^^

Really Really good news and bad news...

2009-06-20T08:58:00.000-07:00

This time i speak of the truth... nothing but the truth and only the truth... these r really some bad and good news... i don't know whether it would effect u or even concerne u but still... i'll post it out anyways....

Bad news:
The bad news is that there is a slight change of plans about aus... well... its like this... my brother's VISA isn't finish yet and were kinda helping him 2 do so... so the plans on going 2 aus... is kinda delayed or as we all say postponed till the 7th july... the other thing is that my birthday is near and i have 2 celebrate it away from my frens... sad isn't it... i never wanted 2 go but i don't think i have a choice... i'm gonna miss u guys for sure... i will!!!!... let just hope that on the plane i don't cry becoz that it will be the last day for me 2 actually c u guys...

Good news:
The good news is that i'm coming back after the 24th... so yeay for me... i can actually c u guys again for a few days... so here the thing... maybe i might throw a party like last time... that was fun now right??? so... save everythin while i get back from kl.... ^^

P.S.
wat ever thing that i have in my home which belongs 2 u... i handed it over when i get back from kl.... and no 1 is allowed in my home when i'm gone!!!! UNDERSTAND!!!!!!!! ^^... stay happy!!!!

GOOD NEWS AND BAD NEWS ABOUT THE WONDERFULL TRUTH!!!

2009-06-17T19:56:00.000-07:00

i know we've been frenz for like a long time now right??? even for a year, thats stil a long time.... we're like buddies now right??? pal's??? right??? so wat i'm about 2 say is the truth and i hope u can forgive me if i insulted u or anything... at least tell me whether i did or did not... okay?????

BAD NEWS:

The bad news is that your all smart, all of u went through SPM right and some of u got like straight A1's, some got 6 A1's, some of u got 2 A1's, and some of u even got no A1's, but still your still not as smart as i am... u know y??? its actually becoz i'm a well known professor working in my secret underground lab.... i've come up with an experiment 2 test your mind and test your intellect.... so wat i've discovered is that for the past few year or months... u people still can't get wat i'm doin... Damn i'm good at this... still u have no clue on wat i was going 2 do... sad really 2 c u people being tortured like that... so this is y i decide 2 write it down here and now... i'm a good guy now really... i never wanted 2 do this but i couldn't help myself.. i just wanted 2 have some fun and c whether u guys r really that intellegent... but through my experiment i can c that u people need more intellegence... so this is y i came up with univercity's and collenge for u people 2 continue your study's... cool huh!!???

GOOD NEWS:

Now in the good new is that im a gentle and kind hearted guy... i help an old lady cross the street, i help collect plants flower in the park when i'm off work in my lab, i work countless hours 2 create a new type of cure for the AH1N1 disease ( not a very progessive thing 2 work on)... u c... i', a kind hearted man with simple needs... so here the good news of the whole thing... those who think i'm going 2 Australia and not coming back... i'm not staying there anymore... i'm still able 2 come back.... u knw y??? its not becoz of any family business or any financial problem or an big foot stold my passport... its just that u people got punked(tricked) by the ONE and ONLY MUA

My 1st bold HAIR CUT

2009-06-17T07:02:00.000-07:00

Damn this stupid network or blogger or watever u call it... i tried adding a new post last night and it didn't work... so a had 2 wait 1 entire night and re-write this damn thing... i think i typed this more then 3 or more times already... i'm getting tired of typing the same thing out... damit...

so... this is wat i've been typing from yesterday till now... hope u appreciate it... (OR ELSE!!!!)... i just 1 2 show u my very 1st BOLD hair cut... and there it is!!!!!! TAAAA DAAAAA

it looks like a daed plant now doesn't it????

so heres the thing... went there for the 1st day and BAM!!!! straight away they call us 2 cut our hair... i was actually kinda neverse at that time... u may think that im a wuss or a scardy cat or something... and i don't care... hair is important 2 a guys look u know... and this... this is just cruel!!! their toying with my hair... kinda sad actually... and a little bit embarressing... becoz they purposely cut it like that then film it and then cut it off... damit!!!... o u know how embarressing that is??? geez... its like wearing your underwear infront of girls... u know wat i mean???!!!! haizz... o well can't change the past though....

Back from PLKN

2009-06-09T05:29:00.000-07:00

well well well... wat can i say... im finally free from camp... wat i expriece there was quite fun actually but theres just 1 thing that i hate the most... that is the morning assembly... my goodness... we have 2 wake up at 5 o'clock in the morning, get dress for morning assembly, then at 5.45 am, we have 2 be in the marching field... wooooohhh.... really tiring man!!!! but other then that it was kinda fun la...

well... this is how i feel in the 1st month... i felt like going home becoz i was sick of that place... calling us 2 wake up that early and not giving us enough sleep... we actually sleep for 5-6 hour per day... the other 18 hour is occupied with hell loads of activity... haizz... that was the 1st month of the camp... on the 2nd month, i was getting use 2 the schedule they had...it like we had school last time... morning school, go back in the afternoon, then tuition, then dinner, then sleep... same as camp... morning assembly, then class, then u go back 2 your dorm for rest, in the afternoon u get 2 do physical activities, then dinner, then at night sometimes there r functions, after that sleep... so yea its about the same as living our past live... on the last month, i feel as if it was nothing... as if that time passes through with a snap... damn.... time really flies when your having fun!!!! so... don't think that this camp isn't as good as it seems... actually its kinda fun being in camp!!!! ^^

Weird Couple

2009-03-17T09:21:00.000-07:00

Yo leo... i know im not suppose 2 put this but i can't help it... u c this picture... weird ha... i think there a couple or something... well... i can't blame them... their my darling bah... the 1 u c at the back there oso my darling... sot sot de... this post i speak abit of broken english... haha... o well... nothin much 2 say bah... ooo... the picture was taken in the plane while we were flying 2 kota kinabalu... weird ha??? haha

jelous fact

2009-03-15T09:35:00.000-07:00

this post r for men 2 read... who ever is a girl that read this post will get there nose pierced with an iron rod... haha.. just joking... this is actually a fact and the truth i suppose... in life there r all sort of people... tall, skinny, fat, short, ugly, handsome, cute, retarded, and all kind of shapes... some have a combanation of characteritics.. for example... tall but fat... skinny but short... cute but retarded... u know wat i mean... but some people are just lucky... there born with perfect characteristics... perfect body... perfect mind... perfect everything... not even a single flaw... and these people has only 1 advantage 2 them... they don't need 2 do anything and they can have the thing they 1... they just continue with there daily life's and they get wat they 1... i mean girls!!!! they don have 2 do anything... they just walk around and BAM!!! a girl starts 2 be attracted 2 them... u c... for people like them... its just so easy... for people like me... hoooooo... its a whole different story... 1 straight look at me and people think im fat... no no... its ok.. i admit that im fat but 1 thing is for sure... i can never be attractive... the fact is that people like me has 2 work for the things they 1... u know wat i mean... we have charm them from the inside out... with have 2 let them c wat is under all this flesh... we have 2 actually do a hell load of stuff just 2 get a girls attention or even just 2 get a girl 2 notice them... but... all the perfect people can just walk around and girls will start saying "wow, his handsome!!!"... next they start 2 get close 2 them and BLA BLA BLA!!!!... its kinda unfair if your asking me... these people who r perfect... they know they have this power and they start abuse it... givng people false hope of love and wat ever... these kinda of people actually made me kinda sick... hmmm... the fact is... im JELOUS!!! there... i said it... 2 me.. i think... ahhh... forget wat i said....

Good bye my frenz

2009-03-15T09:09:00.000-07:00

good bye my frenz... i will mis u all... even if i just met u for like 2 weeks or not 2 a year... but still... i will miss u all... i specially 1 2 dedicate this msg 2 my frenz which r ah Bai(lawrence) and Aguwa(su chen)... hope i spelled your name right... they just flew 2 KUCHING... frenz r important in life... don u agree???... well i think so... some people say love is always 1st... some say family's r more important... those things r true but u can never forget true frenz... a true fren always helps u when u need help... a true fren will always listen 2 wat u have 2 say... a true fren always steal your money and never pay u back untill your dead in your grave... these r wat true frenz r made of... if u have true frenz... keep them... don throw them away... like a candy wrapper in the park... like old news paper in the dustbin... like... like... i got nothing... ENJOY READING!!!!!!!

Noob Gangster

2009-03-06T10:48:00.000-08:00

u know wat?... funny story actually... i went home 2day feeling sad, stupid and then pathetic... u know y? its becoz i got threaten by a noob gangster... i went out for a walk and came back... on the way back i saw this really weird guy standing there... i knew he was trouble so i just walk passed him as if i didn't c a thing... but my curiousity insticnts kicked in so i took a glimpse of how he looks like and let me tell u he was UUUUGGGLLLYYYY.... but a stroke of bad luck happened 2 found me just as i took a look.... the guy saw me and actually threaten me... he sad "look wat look ha???!!!!". "u 1 die ah??!!!". "huh???!!!". At 1st i was really scared but then i strated laughing becoz of his stupid actsent... the way he talk... its like a chinese guy trying 2 talk english but he doesn't have a clue on wat he was talking about... if u still don't understand... here's a demo on how he talks whenever u call him... "ello!!! AH!!! wat u 1!!!... AH!!!". ^^... stupid isn't it... so then he saw me laughing at him... i tried 2 cover it with something else... i told him that i saw a chinese wearing a penguin suit dancing around the park but then i laughed some more... he thaught i was laughing at him so he threaten me more and told me 2 give him 10K... but as u know i'm a poor guy... i don't have that kind of money and of course i told him that... so he gave me time 2 get ready the money... he gave me 2 days 2 get that kinda money and he told me 2 meet him at the library near the indoor stadium... 10k is alot of money so i put it in a siut case were nobody knows that i'm bringing 10k... 2 days later i actually got the money and as promise at the library... i brought the suit case with me and a camera...when we made the deal... i quickly took a picture of him and ran as fast as i could...

this is the picture that i took... i reported this picture to the police and 2 days later... they called me and said they caught him... after the phone call i laughed so hard that i can hardly breathe... u know why? its becoz this person called wei hwa tripped him by accident... HAHA... (i don't know wat the heck is so funny too) ^^

Expensive love

2009-03-05T07:27:00.000-08:00

i know i'm abit slow but just hear me out... 2 days before valentimes... i went out for a walk in boulevard shoping complex and u know how it is... love in the air... everything there has a heart shape on it... i mean everything.... actually there were just 2 stalls selling all this lovey-dovey stuff... and... i stumble on this... u c this picture here... this thing has 69 teddy bears which cost RM1500... DAMN... thats a really really expensive love!!!!!! RM1500!!!!! DAMN!!!!!

kk(kota kinabalu)

2009-03-04T07:41:00.000-08:00

well... let me tell u about something... a few weeks ago... i think it was 2 weeks ago... i think!!!... i went 2 kk(kota kinabalu)... i was a complete dizaster... we were a group of 12 people... on a mission 2 save the world from utter disstruction... our mission... is to stop the terrorist from invading kk... we were split into 2 groups of 6... my squad was me, leo, jack, elisha, wei ming, and isaac... the other squadrent was lawrence, wui hwa, kha jun, and another 3 person whos name escapes me everytime... hmmm... me as the squad leader and lawrence as theirs... be4 this mission was given... we were training for something like this... something dangerous and ruthless... the day was 15th february 1974... we reach kk at 1000 hours... as we stop by the shelter for the night... me and my squadrent went 2 bed 2 get ready for 2moro... they were so tired... once their head touches the pillow... they went straight 2 sleeping land...

u c that... we just arrive from our destination and his sleeping already....

this is private jack... our weapons specialist... born 2 be a killers... look at him... slacker!!!!!!

Dummies

2009-03-04T07:24:00.000-08:00

look at this picture... wat do u c... lets play a game... locate which is the dummy and which is the human... if your thinking that the middle is the dummy then your an idiot whose blind... but if u say the 2 dummy standing beside jack r the real dummy then your as smart as a 1st gredder... buuuut if u say that the middle is an alien disguise as human trying i implant a microchip on the two dummy so he can spy an the president of the united states of america... then i have 3 facts for u... 1st... your colour blind... aliens never wear that colour... its poisonous... 2nd... your an idiot... thats kk... not the united state of america... and 3rd... your as smart as hell... becoz... becoz... naaahhh... your still a dipstick if u stick to this answer... ^^... hope i didn't insult u 2 bad!!!!^^

CoCa CoLa

2009-03-04T05:33:00.000-08:00

Ahhh... wat can i say about coca cola... i'm actually a fan of it... coca cola shirt... coca cola clock... even my under wear is coca cola... wanna c???.. ooo sorry... i don have the photo but i'll show u something really special... i went 2 kk(kota kinabalu) for a vacation and i stumble upon a really really cool thing... even cooler then seeing big foot in the forest... even more cooler then seeing an alien taking a shower... the coolest thing ever... a coca colo convention... its where all crazy coca cola fans gather and share tips about coca cola... theres all sorts of tips... like erm... how 2 drink it or erm... ugh... the important thing was i got a very very VERY special present... its even special then... then... ooo its just special!!!!

look here... this is a jenuin kota kinabalu coca cola...

i was so lucky that i had the chance 2 take a picture of a coca cola can from kk... haizz... wat am i doing with my life???!!!!! ^^

New frenz

2009-02-08T08:06:00.000-08:00

Hmmm... wat can i say.... as time pass, we grow older... as time pass, we meet new people... and as time pass, we increase our collection of frens... this past few years of my life... if been alone... well, not exactly alone per say... i nvr met such good people in my life... i don't really know them that long but still... they treat my like a family... i feel comfartable around.... although i don't talk much but still... ^^... these r my new frens i made in the past year... ^^...

this is Kerry Yong and me...

this is Ee Hau... almost 1 of my new frenz... i know him for not more then a year...

can't show u all of them coz i got enciffecient pictures of them... so sorry...^^

Extra Info

2009-02-08T06:15:00.000-08:00

This is very very very very important info... when u read this im actually giving u free knowledge of something new... but... wat this is... u don't have a clue do u.... its a disease... I, myself have been infected by this horrible disease... this thing inside me could be even worse then cancer... cancer kills u when the time is right... but this disease i have now with me... it torture u every single day of your entire life... i have been studied by doctors at the university for very pro doctors... i was so relieved that i got help from such experienced people... but they let me down becoz they said 2 me that there wasn't any cure for my disease... they said they have nvr seen anything like it in there experience... so in the end... i still suffer from this diseases... the symthoms r being bored, doing nothing but watch tv, staying at home all day, and sleep.... this disease is called the BORING-JAIDUS!!!!!!!!!!!

Ahh.. The Good Old Days

2009-02-08T05:55:00.000-08:00

Ahhhhh... the good old days... we were all crazy back then... this photo was taken when i was in form 4... we took a this picture when it was teachers day... u know how reckless the school can get when its teachers day right??? glitter flying here and there... cake being toss at people... some people even use flour instead of glitter... ugh... messy... haha... but... me and bennet had an arguement about something not long ago.... so can say we "kat dao" la... but in the end we started talking again and thats a good thing... i know this nvr works for any 1 but i know i t did for me... forgive and forget... i'd try saying sorry 2 him but he didn't 1 2 accept it... so i let time heal our wound in our friendship and i guess it works... for me!!!! ^^

My brother

2009-02-08T02:29:00.000-08:00

For those of u who haven't seen my brother before... here he is.... Ta Daaaa!!!! And yes... he look alot better then me... i know i know-.-... but who am i 2 argue... thats nature... ^^... i think its fair... my brother the handsome 1 and i'm the cute 1... hahahaha... just kidding...

Almost Mine

2009-02-08T02:12:00.000-08:00

U c this car??!!! it was almost mine 2 drive... it was smooth... semi-automatic... sporty... sexy... chicks are going 2 love riding my car.... i thought 2 myself if i were 2 have this car... ooohhh damn... i would be the centre of attention... YEAH!!!! I gave it a test drived and let me tell u... it can go really really really fast... damn... but... instead of getting that car... i got a proton... QMA308... -.-... well.. its better then not drivng anything right... so yea... ^^

Golfers

2009-02-08T01:58:00.000-08:00

In this picture... these r the people who plays golf with me everyday... in the past... haha... Now... everyones being some where else doing something different... we... the fellow students of our couch (the 1 in the back with the mustach) where playing a competition... except 1 for the 1 in the brown shirt... he wasn't playing... don't know who won and who losed... haha... it was kinda long ago... so i didn't really bother remembering... if i win sure i remember de... haha...

New Day, New Beginning!!!

2009-02-08T01:49:00.000-08:00

Well... this is my 1st time blogging so yea... nothing much in my life... just feel like typing alot... don't blame me if i don't update this thing.... ^^... Now... 2 more impotant stuff... me!!!... haha... well... i'm leaving soon... 2 kuala lumpur... 2 live my dream... 2 become a world class chef!!... it my seem that a chef's life is diffucult but hey... its wat i 1 2 be.... and thats my life... u can't force me 2 change unless your my parents... thats diffferent^^...