betrayal

have u ever feel cold steel run through your body before??? a bullet? a steel pipe??? or maybe a KNIFE???!!! well... i have... and i guess that having that in me isn't as fun as it sounds or looks... but i don't mean it literally of course... i mean getting stab at the back... to ever call them brothers and they do nothing to appreciate the things u do... to call them best frenz when toy with u like your some kind of machine... to call them frenz when they do nothing to help u out...

for some reason... i keep on telling myself that being kind to other or at least be generous to them would be the right thing to do... and it is... its not about the thing u get in return... its just becoz its right... but... for all these years... i've done my part for my frenz and they did nothing for me... sure they treat me to a meal or 2... but still... they stab me in the back by doing nothing... i needed their to solve my problems... wat do they do?? nothing...

i'm sick of it... i'm sick of my life... i'm sick of having to call these people my frenz who stabs me in the back... and i'm sick of getting scolded for the things i didn't do... wat does the world has against me... living in a rich family when i can't share anything with the people i care most... maybe i'm just not meant to have frenz...

u know... i don't get it... if they were really my frenz... they would do wat they can to help me solve this problem... huh... but who was i kidding... i don't have frenz... i'm always alone in this world... i guess that god doesn't 1 me to have frenz... to live in the shadows forever... -.-...