Sick of it!!!

do u know wat i'm sick of??? i'm really sick of it... to think that i have tons of frenz and i did nothing to appreciate the thing they do... to say "live my life to the fullest" where i'm just fooling myself... to be a piece of nothing, a piece of dead weight to the world where nobody thinks i even exist... i sick of my life... sometimes i dream... yeah... even people like me dream... worthless piece of nothing dreams too... its just wonderful to dream... so wish that i can live in a dream and never wake up... but thats just a fantasy we all wish for... and we all know that wishes never come true becoz it doesn't even exist to begin with... its just a word that manipulates our minds believe that some would come true in a maricle... to fill nonsense in our mind... like hope and love and all these other bullshits.. but wat ever these things r... they seem to work work with our minds... even though we know that these r just words that means nothing... it still brings hope to our heads... well... most people... i for 1 never believe that wishes r true... everything we do in this world lies in the faith of our hands... but to know that u can never accomplish the things that u wish for... hurts deep within me... there r some moment that i just really 1 2 kill myself and start over... but wat good will that do... u tell me??!!